9.5 The Enemy of Spiritual Growth
One of the greatest obstacles to cultivating the fruits of spiritual wellness is the ego, a part of the mind that plays a role in distinguishing ourselves from others, interpreting experiences, and making decisions. More specifically, the ego plays a role in:
- Self-image (“Who I think I am.”)
- Personal identity (roles, labels, achievements)
- Self-protection (defensiveness, pride, fear of failure)
- Social comparison (status, competition, judgment)
How the Ego Blocks Spiritual Growth
The ego thrives on separation, pride, comparison, attachment, and control—all of which prevent the cultivation of inner peace, harmony, and truth. Here are some of the ways that the ego blocks spiritual growth:
- Need for control: The ego often insists on controlling situations, people, and outcomes to protect itself from uncertainty or vulnerability. This can lead to conflicts and stress when things don’t go according to plan.
- Defensiveness: When challenged or criticized, the ego becomes defensive, interpreting feedback as an attack or threat.
- Pride: When fueled by ego, pride can become a barrier to growth making it difficult to accept feedback, consider new ideas, or admit when we are wrong, because we believe we already know everything we need to know.
- Comparison: The ego fuels constant comparison with others to reinforce its sense of worth. This diminishes internal peace and increases dissatisfaction, envy, and resentment.
- Attachment to identity: The ego often identifies strongly with roles, status, or material possessions. Losing or questioning these external identifiers can threaten self-worth and stability, creating anxiety and distress.
- Resistance to forgiveness: The ego thrives on maintaining grudges because forgiving is seen as a loss or weakness. Holding grudges, however, prevents healing and disrupts inner peace.
Activity
Click on the flip cards to read real-life examples of how the ego blocks spiritual growth.
Text Description
- Need for Control: When a parent insists on controlling every aspect of their child’s choices, tension can arise, damaging their relationship rather than fostering trust and harmony. Peace would come more easily by letting go of excessive control and trusting the child’s judgment.
- Defensiveness and Pride: If a person at work receives constructive feedback on their performance, an ego-driven response might be anger, defensiveness, or denial, causing tension with colleagues rather than collaboratively working toward improvement.
- Comparison and Jealousy: Seeing friends or peers achieve success (like promotions or social recognition) can trigger feelings of jealousy or inadequacy if one’s ego is threatened by others’ accomplishments, disrupting internal peace and external relationships.
- Attachment to Identity: If someone is deeply attached to their career status or wealth and experiences job loss or financial setbacks, the ego perceives this as an existential threat, causing emotional distress and limiting adaptability and resilience.
- Resistance to Forgiveness: Two family members might remain distant after a minor misunderstanding because each waits for the other to apologize first, driven by ego. Neither experiences reconciliation nor peace.
