6.2 Internal Messengers

While there is no scientific consensus on how to define an emotion, it is commonly understood as a naturally occurring state of mind and body that can be derived from one’s circumstances (i.e., what is happening around us), mood (i.e., how we are feeling overall), and/or relationships (i.e., the connections we share with people, places and things).

Emotions (and more broadly, feelings) can be understood as internal messengers. They are signals your body and mind send to alert you that something meaningful is happening and are often tied to your values, beliefs, or personal boundaries.

Each emotion carries a message. For example:

• Sadness often signals that you have lost something important.

• Anger may indicate that a personal boundary has been crossed.

• Envy can suggest that you desire something someone else has.

While emotions can feel pleasant or unpleasant, experiencing them doesn’t make you a “good” or “bad” person. They are not moral judgments; they are simply data. What matters is how you respond to them. For instance, if you feel profound grief after the loss of a parent, that is a natural and valid emotional response. Choosing to suppress that feeling by consuming alcohol might prolong or complicate healing, whereas expressing it by sharing memories with a friend can help you process it in a healthier way.

One helpful metaphor is to picture emotions as one side of a coin labelled “feelings.” The other side of that coin consists of physical sensations, such as dizziness, nausea, or brain fog, that often accompany emotional states. From a cognitive-behavioural perspective, these feelings (both emotional and physical) arise from a combination of your thoughts and actions.

Consider how this plays out in the workplace: Suppose you repeatedly think, “My boss is evil, narcissistic, and hates me.” These thoughts are likely to evoke emotions like resentment, fear, or helplessness. However, if your thoughts shift to something like “My boss is probably under a lot of pressure and may be struggling at home,” you might instead feel empathy, curiosity, or even detachment. The circumstances have not changed. However, the emotional response is based on how you interpret them.

Emotions can also be compared to a double-edged sword.