18 First device (Invention of the the Kithara): 20-64

The Birth of Hermes (continued)

He,

came into the light

quickly springing (not falling)

across the threshold

of the womb

of his divine mother  [20]

But, he was never the sort to lay still for long

[to accept the circumstances he had been given]

Not for him:

cooing like a baby in his crib of woven-reeds, or

sitting idle in his temple

He was already focused on a grand plan.

The first step: steal the cattle of Apollo.

So…even though he had just been born

He,

went out again, into the light

springing quickly (not walking) 

over the threshold

of his palatial-roofed home

(aka. the cave)

His First Device

The Kithara-lyre and Bard-song

Right over the threshold

Hermes found something unexpected:

something that was somehow both

a reptile and

infinite rapture.

This is because Hermes

was first of all (if you can believe it)

to transform 25

tortoise

into

tale-singer.

Lady Tortoise

[You know how this type of ‘god meets girl’ story goes…]

She

first caught his eye

outside the threshold of the courtyard door,

a delicious snack — unsuspecting —

on the grass in front of the house.

Swinging her rolling hips provocatively,

as she sauntered along.

That child

— a ‘friend-with-benefits‘,

truly a son-of-Zeus [if you know what I mean]–

ogled her hungrily.

And as he looked her

up

and

down

he couldn’t help but laugh.

A transformative laugh that changed everything.

Looking at the tortoise’s slow walk and swinging hips,

he joked:

“Wow. I can hardly believe that

Hermes (the luck-bringer)

has sent me such a lucky sign, such a Hermes-gift

— and so promptly!”

— Just like him, we would one day call

an unexpected bit of luck a Hermes-gift —,

He continued:

“Of course, one such as I would never

waste

impiously mock or

abuse

such a god-send [30]

[Instead,

I am inspired to properly hymn you:

my divine gift].

[Hymn to Lady Tortoise]

My subject:

[‘Hail, Lady Tortoise. ]

Now that you are present among us,

O Divine revelation,

May you always fare well

Your titles:

Lovely-sexy-thing,

“Dancing”-girl

…-for-a-good-price(*wink, wink*),

Classy-Escort-to-the-Feast

….-and-afterwards (if you know what I mean).

Your domain:

[Your home is…

… wait—

How did you get here, my lovely-toy?

Judging by your beautiful shell

[and its many-eyed pattern]

Aren’t you rather far from your mountain home?

Anyway…

[in the way of these divine movements,

[it does not matter where your home was…

once]

Your domain (now):

My home will be your domain now —

at least, according to the desires that fill my heart,

that is where I will take you

Into my bedroom, that is–

where you will serve me and

become my “friend-with-benefits.“

Now, now –be not afraid!

Also, don’t get huffy,

I don’t expect you to give anything away for free:

I promise that I will pay you a fair price for your services!

… but you might need to give me some “benefits” first. 35

Anyway, you know the old saying:

“Never outside your home explore;

–it’s best to stay in your shell–

’cause once your neck is past the door,

you’ll find all the harms of hell.”

…speaking of harms and hell…

Your roles:

you will be a charm

against the hellish harms of witchcraft and spells

for as long as you live. But…

…after death,

you will sing

such beautiful tales.”

When he had finished his silly ode,

he lifted her up happily,

using both of his tiny, baby hands

and took her back into his playroom —

his most darling toy,

his plaything– 40

[He set her down gently,

on her back]

He took in his other hand

his grey-iron pick and

mutilated

her.

Piercing

her

straight

through

to her

core

it was over in a single stroke.

[With such power, it only took one.]

She was

Lady Tortoise,

a beautiful Escort-to-the-feast

far-from-her-mountain-home

Once.

Now, transformed:

the lifeless shell

of a mountain tortoise .

[So thus he defeated his first labour:

slaying a monster:

fierce

with many-eyes,

warden-of-the-threshold.]

Invention of the Kithara

[But now behold how quickly

he made his first invention

and fulfilled his promise to Tortoise–]

As swiftly as:

for a human crushed under his worries

–already so many; closing in, all around–

A new dark thought pierces his mind

–even one single worry more–

straight through to his very core.

Or as swiftly as:

the light of flashing vision

dances out from the eyes

to see danger coming 45

That was how quickly he transformed

his promise

into profit

and intent

into invention

Hermes,

famous-for-his-crafts.

[And here is the craft itself:]

Taking up some reed string,

–carefully trimming it to fit the width of the shell–

he wove it up and down through the rim

–he had drilled holes around it in a circle —

And used these ties to secure a piece of thin leather,

–stretched taut across the hollow middle–

To the top of the device, he then attached two curving horns,

–joined with a crossbar– 50

From the cross, he stretched and attached seven stringed chords

— the cried song of a ewe woven into gut-strings.

[And so it was:

the first phronmynx-lyre]

This craft and these techniques

–though now well-known–

were invented by him.

Finished, he carried it outside–

his most darling toy,

his plaything– 40

[Setting her gently,

in his left arm]

He took in his other hand

his pick and

he tuned

the strings,

one

after

the

other.

Then

With a single strum of his hand,

all cried out — seven stringed voices as one–

sharp notes,

shocking,

never-before-heard.

The First Hymn

The little god harmonized his notes

with another beautiful invention:

the first bard’s song 55

[And here is the craft itself:]

His voice weaved improvisation,

in counterpoint to the melody,

just as boys:

a little tipsy at the festival,

try to one-up each other,

each loud shout

responded to by another.

Amplifying funny boasts

and veiled jokes.

[The divine bard then sang this very hymn:]

Of Zeus, heir to Kronos’ throne,

alongside his expected Queen …

 Maia with-sandals-that-showed-off-her-beautiful-legs.

How long ago, Maia and Zeus were so often

and with such passion, coming together…

to the assembly of the gods as partners,

All the shocking and intimate details

of the acts which ultimately generated Hermes…

his well-known and honour-filled lineage, that is.

The source of Hermes’ wealth

was dragged into the light…

that is,

all the possessions of his Queenly nymph-mother

(appropriate for a great god on Olympus):

many servants

luxurious mansions, 60

many palaces full of golden tripods

and silver pitchers.

He sang of all these matters

as if they were true in the past…

but was focused on how

to make them true in the future.

Her though

the key to his transformative plans

he quickly concealed in his sacred reed crib

only to be revealed at the perfect moment.

His secret weapon:

the Lyre, hollow-bellied

While his own hollow belly hungered

for flesh.