8.3 Spotlight on Human Resources Skills

Curiosity: We are always intentional about how curiosity and inquiry support connection, growth, learning and engagement.

This curiosity isn’t fueled by personal gain but by a genuine interest in connection. We encourage curiosity while respecting the boundaries and protecting the privacy of the people we support.

We are continually curious but not invasive while challenging assumptions and narratives. We ask powerful questions and offer generosity of assumption to those who think differently than we do. We know that listening and asking questions are more important than providing answers.

Fostering a sense of curiosity within relationships supports connection. Curiosity is a powerful force in our well-being, playing an important role in connection and communication.

Some benefits of cultivating curiosity:

• Curiosity calms the nervous system.
• Curiosity supports us to seek out new possibilities, which makes way for HOPE.
• Curiosity is the antidote to a fixed mindset. It supports us in thinking differently and more mindfully while shifting our perspectives.
• Curiosity supports us to challenge our assumptions and biases.
• Curiosity encourages us to get to know other people better.

Learning to ask powerful questions is essential to peer support work. When we ask good questions, we are helping someone to tap into their inner wisdom and reflect in a new way. When we ask questions rather than give advice, we acknowledge that we don’t have the answers.

When we talk about curiosity, we want to ensure that we are clear on the purpose of our questions. If we are asking something to satisfy a self-focused curiosity or our own desire for information, it’s best to refrain from asking those types of questions. To assess whether or not a question is good for you to ask, we need to consider:

• Who is benefiting from this question?
• Does this question support the person engaging in self-reflection?
• Does this question support a connection?

Traits of Powerful Questions

Once you read about the three traits of powerful questions, consider the ways in which you might utilize powerful questions in your personal and professional life.

1. Powerful Questions Are Always Open-Ended and Promote Reflection

An open-ended question can’t be answered with a simple “yes” or “no.”

Think of how you might start an open-ended question. Strong questions often start with WHAT, as they are neutral and encourage people to self-reflect. That’s not a hard and fast rule, though. A good question can start with HAVE/HAS, HOW, IF, or CAN.

It’s important not to ask a question to which you are looking for a specific answer because it’s not open-ended.

Questions that promote reflection create opportunities for people to tap into their knowledge and insight. We can ask past-focused questions to help discover or uncover and then future-forward questions to invite dreaming and planning.

If someone tells you they are feeling anxious today, asking a powerful question can help them figure out more specifically how they feel and what potentially made them feel that way.

However, it’s important to note here that a WHY question is often best avoided in a peer situation. A WHY question is different, as it tends to ask people to analyze their situation. “Why did you do that?” Or “Why are you always so hard on yourself?” “Why” questions slip into more of a counselling type of situation, and we want to avoid that.

2. Powerful Questions Are Fueled by Curiosity and Aren’t Focused on an Agenda

Sometimes, when we ask a question with a hidden agenda, trying to elicit a specific response, it can feel really uncomfortable for the person we are asking. They can often sense that we are trying to guide the conversation rather than approach it with genuine curiosity.

When having a heart-to-heart, asking a question like “Have you ever thought about going for counselling?” is not open-ended. In a way, we just offer some underhanded advice disguised by a question. A better, more powerful question might be, “What have you done in the past that has helped you?” Some respond well to “What’s worked in the past, and what didn’t?”

3. Powerful Questions Stimulate Reflection

When given the gift of space to reflect on a situation, people are likelier to find the answer within themselves.

Be ok with silence. Don’t feel like you have to fill up the space with talking. The space of silence can be a powerful opportunity for reflection–for both the person you are talking to and also you!

What can you do to get more comfortable with silence?

The Art of the Open-Ended Question

Whether you are conducting a job interview, an investigation, solving a workplace problem or helping to resolve a conflict at work, Human Resources professionals should rely on open-ended questions to elicit a helpful response.

Let’s examine a few “closed-ended” questions and turn them into “open-ended” questions.

Chapter 8 Exercise 2

It is time to practice your skills. Below, you will find three workplace scenarios. You are responsible for filling in the “Newly created open-ended question” in the three scenarios.

Closed question: I understand you are responsible for the upcoming company dinner. Do you know the final headcount for dinner?

Employee response: No

Reflection: You have the employee’s response, but you still need to figure out what they know about the headcount for the upcoming dinner.

Newly created open-ended question:

Closed question: I understand there was a misunderstanding with a customer yesterday. Do you want to tell me what happened?

Employee response: No

Reflection: You have the employee’s response, but you have no idea what happened yesterday.

Newly created open-ended question:

Closed question: I am working on a marketing campaign for our new cell phone design, and I need some information from your design team. Can I stop by later today and interview a few of your designers?

Employee response: No

Reflection: You have their response, but you still need to gain access to their design team for your marketing campaign.

Newly created open-ended question:

Helpful Open-Ended Questions

It is extremely difficult to answer “yes” or “no” to a question that begins with the word “why”, such as “why did you skip the morning meeting?” It is best to avoid questions that begin with the word “did,” such as “Did you attend the staff meeting last week?” as the other person can answer yes or no. These questions won’t give you the necessary information to solve problems or resolve conflicts.

Here is a list of helpful open-ended questions and statements that will assist you when solving problems or resolving workplace conflicts. Pay particular attention to the first word in each question.

• Describe what you witnessed on the way to work.
• Would you share your understanding of what happened in the staff meeting?
• What did your co-worker do after the presentation?
• When did you notice the folder was missing?
• Who did you work with on this project?
• Where did you go after the safety training session?
• How would you describe a typical day in your role?

Unexpected Insights

One benefit of asking open-ended questions is the unexpected responses you might elicit. Returning to our earlier conversation about bias, you might think you know the answer to the questions you pose. People often surprise us and share facts or details we never expected to hear. These nuances may lead your conversation or investigation in an entirely different direction and lead to a solution or resolution.

“Compassionate Curiosity – Asking Good Questions” from Post-Secondary Peer Support Training Curriculum by Jenn Cusick is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 International License, except where otherwise noted.