9 Coping

“Coping is defined as a person’s constantly changing cognitive and behavioral efforts to manage specific external and/or internal demands that are appraised as taxing or exceeding the person’s resources” ( (Folkman, Lazarus, Dunkel-Schetter, DeLongis, & Gruen, 1986,p. 993).

Beehr and McGrath (1996) classified five different types of coping over time:

There are two types of coping strategies that we tend to use: Emotion and Problem-Focused Coping.

Emotion focused coping strategies work to try to change our emotional reaction to a situation by altering the meanings we associate with it or its perceived significance in our lives.

Some examples of common strategies used to this end are:

• Distancing (ex. trying to forget about it, making light of the situation, using humor, going on like nothing happened)
• Accepting responsibility (ex. realizing I had brought it on myself, promising to do differently next time, owning it)
• Escape/avoidance (ex. avoiding it, wishing it would just go away)
• Positive reappraisal (ex: viewing it as an opportunity or a growth experience, looking for possible lessons from the experience, finding the silver-lining)

Problem focused coping tries to fix our problem at its source.

Some common strategies used to this end may include:

• Confronting the situation head on (ex: standing our ground, trying to get another person to change their mind, expressing feelings at the person who caused the problem; etc.)

• Seeking social support (ex. trying to find out more about the situation and harness resources to help us confront it head on, asking for advice, talking about it with someone trusted)

• Problem solving (ex. making an action plan and following through with it, changing something, increasing our effort, trying multiple solutions)

Problem focused coping involves both the processes of planning and problem solving (our thoughts) as well as the direct actions that we undertake to implement solutions (our behaviors).