9.6 Eulogy Writing
Steps to Preparing a Eulogy
- Gather information and memories.
- Talk to people who were close to the person.
- Go through old photographs, letters/emails, videos, etc.
- Do some research to learn more about things the person was passionate about or involved in (e.g., hobbies, favourite music, etc.).
- Organize your thoughts, write in stages (e.g., creating an outline and draft notes).
- Use storytelling as opposed to a list of details of the person’s life.
- Decide on a theme.
- Decide on tone (e.g., somber, reflective, loving, humorous, etc.).
- Carefully choose the memories you will focus on.
- Be respectful. Do not talk about private or embarrassing things, or negative things that are out of character for the person.
- Think of and try to connect with your audience, do not make it all about your relationship with the deceased.
- Include moments meant to lighten the mood (i.e., through laughter).
- Close the eulogy (e.g., with a message to the deceased, a line from their favourite poem or song, their favourite quote, etc.).
- Write the eulogy out full.
- Seek feedback of the final product.
(7 Simple Tips, June 21, 2020; Eulogies & Obituaries, n.d.; Meade, n.d.; Lastly.com, n.d.-c)
Preparing to Deliver a Eulogy
- Practice and time your eulogy several times. Tape and listen to yourself to make sure you are projecting your voice and speaking slowly and clearly.
- Know your time limit.
- Know where your eulogy fits in the order of speakers.
- Know who your audience will be (e.g., family only or a larger more diverse group, in person and/or online).
- Know the context for the eulogy. Where will the eulogy take place. Will there be a podium for your notes? Will there be a microphone?
- Arrive early on the day you are giving the eulogy.
- Know that it is alright to show how you are feeling (i.e., choked up, tears).
- Make sure to bring a bottle of water and tissues.
- Remember to introduce yourself, to inform the audience how you know the deceased.
- Make eye contact with the audience during your delivery.
(Meade, n.d.; How to write, September 22, 2021).
How to Write a Eulogy
Click the following links to learn more about the essential components of a eulogy and how to go about writing and preparing to give an engaging and meaningful one:
How to give a eulogy that truly celebrates the person you’re honoring
How to write a good eulogy for a funeral
VIDEO: How to Write a Eulogy
In this TEDx Talk, Bret Simner talks about how to give a eulogy and explains how “delivering a eulogy is an opportunity to share something beautiful”.